Real awards for real people

in the early morning on Friday, the 7th of October 2005 by Chad

While politics rules the Nobel prizes, such as the idiots at the UN atomic agency getting the peace prize, here are the deserving winners of awards…

This year’s other Ig Nobel prizewinners include:

_ PHYSICS: Since 1927, researchers at the University of Queensland in Australia have been tracking a glob of congealed black tar as it drips through a funnel - at a rate of one drop every nine years.

_ PEACE: Two researchers at Newcastle University in England monitored the brain activity of locusts as they watched clips from the movie “Star Wars.”

_ ECONOMICS: A graduate student at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology invented “Clocky,” an alarm clock on wheels that rolls away and hides so people have to wake up and get out of bed to turn it off.

_ NUTRITION: A Japanese researcher has photographed and analyzed every meal he’s eaten over the past 34 years.

_ FLUID DYNAMICS: Scientists at universities in Germany, Finland and Hungary studied the digestive habits of penguins for a paper titled, “Pressures Produced When Penguins Pooh.”

_ AGRICULTURAL HISTORY: A researcher at Massey University in New Zealand studied technological changes in dairy farming for a paper called, “The Significance of Mr. Richard Buckley’s Exploding Trousers.”

_ CHEMISTRY: An experiment at the University of Minnesota was designed to prove whether people can swim faster or slower in syrup.