Tales from the East Coast #2: A Tale of Two Whip-its
mid-afternoon on Thursday, the 17th of February 2005 by Anarchy
A long time ago… when Chad and I were young… we always seemed to have money… and we didn’t have too many responsibilities… so needless to say, we were drunk alot. If only we had been able to find jobs as professional drinkers, then life would have been perfect.
Anyway… we were sitting around his house and making a few administrative changes to his old BBS, The Castle Talamasca. Boredom soon overcame us, so he threw in his old VHS copy of “The Unnameable”. (If you enjoy H.P. Lovecraft’s work, then I recommend checking it out. Most people find it difficult to watch, but we always enjoyed it.) Anyway, the movie was playing… and I was getting thirsty. So we fetched some beers. Then, we had a couple more. Next thing you know, we’ve lost track of the movie and we’re just doing whatever we can to get drunk. (Like I said before, we were young and had no real responsibilities to think of… so we could get away with this on a Tuesday night.)
Well… we hadn’t made a trip to the liquor store recently, so we were stuck with stealing his Dad’s beer. So the entire process was taking a while… and being young, lazy bastards… we weren’t about to get up and go in the middle of our movie.
Then… Chad had an idea of how we could make the evening more entertaining. Opening up his cabinet, he pulled out a nitrous canister and a box full of N2O cartridges. It was whip-its time. After the first hit, and in a deep, gas-induced, baritone voice; he declares, “First one to drop thier beer… Loses.”
Well… the next hour went by with the speed of Barry Allen… and the box of N2O cartridges was almost empty.
My turn came up… and I took a nice long draw. Held it… exhaled… and watched the world spin. Then, I woke up. Having fallen backwards off my chair, I was laying on the floor… arm frozen in mid-drink position… with beer pouring out onto my forehead.
Chad was looking down at me, and said “I’m impressed.”
“Why?”, I asked. “I lost consciousness and hit the floor.” I started struggling to my feet.
“Yes,” he smiled, “but you didn’t drop your beer!”
(No Ratings Yet)
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February 17th, 2005 at 8:06 pm
Yeah, but you forgot, Lori was there that night too!
February 17th, 2005 at 9:17 pm
Was she? Wow… I must have been good and gone to not remember that. I do vaguely remember her laying on the bed and watching the movie, now that you mention it.
September 3rd, 2008 at 6:00 pm
ah…the good ole’ days eh? hehe
September 4th, 2008 at 7:28 am
Yeah, the good ol’ days… just need the waffle house menu to guide you to heaven!
September 4th, 2008 at 9:59 pm
Who last had the Waffle House menu? Was it Jeff?
I still have my Enchanted Marble of Caffeinated Celerity. However, I had so much Captain Morgan that weekend that I don’t remember who gave it to me.